You Never Cease To Amaze
by tarotofbadkitties
Summary: Bonnie and Damon are back from 1994, and things are not the way they left them but neither are they. Join me as I take seasons 6 and 7 and have my way with them.


Another day, another slow day at the Grill. It's tempting to wish for a bit of excitement, but Matt Donovan wouldn't dare. He's seen far more excitement than one man needs, so he'd just as well have another day of drudgery. The sun was shining, none of the day drinkers were drunk, none of the patrons seem to have been eaten in the restroom. It was the best sort of day a man could hope for.

"Ugh, Matt! I've had like two customers all day! This is the worst!" howled the lone waitress on the schedule for the day. Christine Dover was a pretty college student with bright green eyes and a chestnut mane that would rival Katerina Pierce's crown of glory. The job at the Grille seemed like a good idea when she accepted it, but Christine was starting to wonder if this it was even worth it. Frustrated she threw herself dramatically onto a bar stool and glowered at Matt as if he were the cause.

"Oh no!" Matt exclaimed, his blue eyes gleaming with laughter. "You're being paid just to be here and not serve anyone! The horror! If you'd like to find somewhere else in town to pay you to not work, you're welcome. I doubt they'd pay you more than I do just to bat your lashes at me!"

"Probably not,"she admitted with a sigh. "I'm not sure there is anywhere else around here that would pay me as much, even if I actually had to work. This place must do serious business when I'm not here for you to pay me at all, much less as well as you do." That's an optimistic idea, but in truth the only reason this place runs at all is to give people somewhere to socialize and give Matt something to do. When Damon Salvatore passed, one of the things in his will was quite a stack of cash for Matt Donovan. It was unexpected, to say the least, but greatly appreciated. The only requirement listed in the will was that he rebuild the Grill, and make it somewhere he would want a drink. With the tendency people have to wake from the dead, Matt took it pretty seriously and thought long and hard about how he wanted to handle it.

Matt smiled, stretched his broad shoulders and looked around his beloved establishment. When it came time to pull the place together, Matt wasn't sure about much. But one thing he was sure about was that he didn't want anyone working under him to struggle the way he did, so he set aside enough to pay them decently no matter how the bar went. When he spoke to Caroline about design concerns, she scrunched her face up at the idea of him attempting to make the decisions himself. _Matt, darling, now you know I love you but you are..not exactly known for your style._ So rather than face the undead wrath of Mystic Falls, he hired an interior decorator. The place was quite a sight to behold, it held onto the small-town charm of the original, but with a distinctly more polished and expensive final result. The place was impressive enough that he could bring in some staff to make it a regional must-see locale, but honestly Matt didn't want that much attention to anything he was doing. Christine might be getting bored, but Matt never gets bored. Not anymore.

Christine took a deep breath, but what she was about to say was never known. At that very second, on the bar between Matt and Christine appeared Bonnie Bennett and Damon Salvatore! And they were both in their underwear, and very much so appeared to have been caught in _flagrante_ _delicto_.

That aborted complaint immediately became an ear-piercing screech. It is well known that in quiet, empty establishments like the Grill humans simply did _not_ appear without warning on top of bars. "What the hell is going on?! MATT!" she screamed, leaping away from the bar with such speed and clumsiness she knocked her bar stool over and would have tumbled to the floor herself if not for her ungraceful haste to get the hell out of there. Matt just laughed because, of course this would happen. And of course it would happen to him. That kind of shit is the very reason he never dares to complain of boredom in Mystic Falls. Clearly the walls can hear you, and if they drop a half naked vampire to entertain you it's never good. Unless you're into that kind of thing.

Bonnie and Damon seemed every bit as confused as the Grille's inhabitants. They blinked at each other and looked around, not immediately springing into any sort of action. Damon was the quickest to recover, and he dashed for Christine. He grabbed her by the shoulder, and looked directly into her terrified green eyes. "You had yet another boring shift of listening to the Quarterback's lame jokes. He let you go home early because nobody was here. You didn't see me, or Bonnie and especially not that Bonnie was in her underwear." This part earned an exasperated sigh from Bonnie, who was at this point hiding behind the bar from Matt. Not that she had to, considering he was distinctly avoiding looking at anyone. Christine smiled, muttered about being glad she could go home early, let her hair down in a dramatic shake, and strolled right out of the door with the kind of calm assurance that only brainwashing can accomplish. Damon locked the door behind her, turned the sign to indicate the bar was closed and kind of sheepishly stood there. Well, sheepish for Damon, which is pretty much his normal impassive stance with just a bit of uncharacteristic fidgeting.

"So," Matt started, laughter still in his blue eyes that still avoided looking at the bar's new patrons, "anyone want to tell me what you guys are doing without your clothes?"

"MATT!" Bonnie squeaked indignantly.

"Let me grab you a uniform from the back, Bon, we probably should have this conversation with you dressed, huh?" he laughed. "Damon, you want something to wear?"

By this point, Damon had managed to compose himself into the sleek, cool facade that he was most known for. "Oh no, Donovan, don't let me put you out. I'm just fine." Matt signed, of course Damon was going to be difficult. But today was not the day for Matt to get himself eaten by pushing it, so Matt just went ahead and got Bonnie a Grille uniform and left Damon in his half naked glory. Soon enough he'd either figure out that trying to make Matt uncomfortable wasn't worth having to wander around half-naked and he'd ask for some damn clothes. Or he could very well march right out of the front door as naked as the day he was born, if that was what he wanted to do. Honestly Matt could care less. He's seen enough in enough locker rooms that he's pretty unfazed.

Once he returned from the employee area, he found Damon and Bonnie engaging in a heated debate of some kind. Bonnie had apparently ceased hiding behind the bar when Matt left and was whispering threatening at Damon with her finger jabbed into his chest. Matt's return prompted her to remember her lack of attire and go back to hiding. "Thank you Matt," came a little voice that followed a little hand coming from the other side of the bar to accept the offered clothing. "I'm turning around," was his reply, which sounded a bit strained with embarrassment. Now that the shock has worn off the situation was becoming more awkward for Matt at a rapidly descending pace. Naked Damon is no big deal, but Bonnie was a whole other issue. Whenever his attention was redirected to her Matt could almost feel her discomfort with being undressed in front of him and it was becoming contagious.

Matt cleared his throat once the rustling that indicated Bonnie's dressing had completed, but still didn't actually turn around. "Now that that's out of the way," he started, "either of you going to tell me what you're doing on my bar?"

"Well," snarked Damon, his eyes glinting mischievously, "we weren't doing much of anything on the bar, but if we'd had a few more minutes-" he started before Bonnie sent him crashing in agony to the floor. Matt was tempted to comment on the fact that Bonnie had her powers back, but that was obvious. What the hell is going on is not obvious, and since they're clearly stalling, it's probably going to be easier to get answers if he does his best to keep them on track.

"We spent quite a bit of time trying to work out a spell we could do to get us back here. We tried it earlier today, but it didn't seem that it worked. Either we were wrong and it worked on a delay, or our other," sigh and eye-roll "companion did something without warning us. Knowing him, it's probably the latter. He probably saw what we were getting up to and decided it would be especially fun to get the spell rolling right then. If I find that guy I'm going to kill him! Again!" By the end of this screed, Bonnie was pounding her little fist on the table and looking one second from starting a Bonnie fire. Matt was not having that after everything it took to finally get something that was his in that town. _Not in my bar!_

"I'm glad you're back, Bon," Matt smiled as he wrapped her in what he hoped was a calming hug. He'd wanted to hug her ever since the shock of her reappearance wore off, but Matt was too much of a gentleman to attempt such a thing until after she got dressed, no matter how reincarnated she might be.

Damon cleared his throat. "So you're not at all curious why you found us in the...way that you found us?" Matt shuddered dramatically.

"Not really. I've learned to mind my business and it's served me pretty well. I might eventually corner Bonnie and ask her," he started, glancing at Bonnie briefly, "But I don't really want to hear your version of anything. No offense."

That prompted a genuine laugh out of Damon. It seems Donovan finally smartened up! "I like what you did with the place. It looks a little like my house, which is creepy, but I am the benefactor of this joint so I guess I should be touched."

"We can continue this lovely conversation later, but right now I have to start getting ready for the evening rush here. I don't know what you guys are gonna tell people, but just so you know what they've said about you, both of you are out of town, travelling or something. Word has it you two eloped. We thought it was a weird joke when we came up with it but considering how I found you too..."

"We eloped?!" yelped Bonnie and Damon simultaneously. Apparently this homecoming is going to be distinctly interesting.


End file.
